The title statement can be true. Sometimes it just takes time. But sometimes you just have to look really hard to see it.

While in the last year of my high school career, I've come upon many realizations and things unveiling in front of my eyes, none of which I blogged about. It seems unnecessary to at this point, but it doesn't mean all those things will leave my head and be forgotten. If only.

It seems the high of high school ended in the last stretch to get through. Senior year. Coming into a school year with such a lovely end to the previous year, and such a fabulous summer, one would have high expectations for the last year to be similar. However just after starting the year, things were put in a trough and never seemed to come back up. Starting from: arguments and the betrayal of those closest to me, having blame always placed upon me, being told my opinion and point of view is wrong, having unexpected and unfortunate things happen to friends and family, having the most stressful times with schoolwork no matter how much I worked on it, being told I haven't earned my chance to be happy yet, thinking things would be better if I weren't around, being reminded of the most unfortunate feeling of my childhood with every family occasion, having a temporary void in my life from sport or a person, having the most stressful finals in my life because it determined my position in National Honor Society (whether I stay in or not), having arguments and frustrations with the one person that kills me to have with, and finally breaking up with the person who supported me throughout that entire first semester... on the day after Valentine's Day.

Having gone through all that, and the very last one, I realized that my truest and most pure friends were there and cared. From those in Friend Club (), to a selection of others who noticed (not like it was hard to) and showed that they cared. But having gone through all that, I realized that the one person who always said she'd be there, always told me I could go to her with anything, always said no matter what we go through, we can still be best friends, and said she always cared, did nothing. Said nothing. Yet treated me like how I was treated throughout my childhood. Shunned. I suppose through this, I realized how fake people really are. And from that, I learned our "friendship" or once was, will never advance from where it is now. And I can be okay with that.

---

After coming to that realization with that person, after not eating for a week and crying for 4 full days and other things from thinking of the possibility of breaking up to going to the real thing with someone very important to me, there wasn't much else to do. We had decided earlier when we broke up, we'd still think it over and talk again in a few days because neither of us knew what to do or wanted the break up to happen. It seemed like the only solution to our frustrations. But after thinking and talking later, we found a better solution and we'll see how it goes I get a feeling that after everything in the first semester of senior year, maybe things will look up, and that this trough is coming to an end.

Hopefully...

~Got Rice?~

So, been busy with school and school and maybe a boy. But that's not gonna stop me from writing my new year's resolutions and checking off my list from before (like I'm Santa ) Last year's goals... (fail by the way)

Academic
- Finish the stack of reading books in my room. (Nope, not even close... okay by a half a book)
- Get Straight A's (a person can dream). (So maybe this one was a dream, not a goal haha)
✔- Have all college applications done before 2011. (Done, done and done! )
(To be continued...) - Get a 5 on an AP test (extended until May 2011).
- Get above 2000 on SATs. (Not even close)

Health
- Exercise more on my own.(I blame school...)
✔- Cut out unnecessary sweets. (Do I get points for half of the year?)
✔- Eat less meat, more veggies (or veggies in general). (Success!!!)
- Break 27 minutes for a 5K run. (Stupid parents going to China for a ridiculous amount of time...)
✔- Learn yoga with friends. (And it was fun )

Personal
✔- Try to save money and spend less. (I give many thanks to someone who helped me with that, not that she cares.)
- Volunteer regularly. (Sooo... never really got through orientation... heehee)
- Give blood regularly. (Tried to. But every time I did, I didn't have enough iron or I got sick... Effort counts?)
✔- Think more positive, try to be happier. (Enough.)
- Clean more around the house =D. (We all knew this was gonna be fail.)
- Be at 54 kg.
✔- Feel better about myself and how I look. (Enough)
- Get my first actual paying job. (So close!... but again, I blame school)
✔- Be a better person.(In my opinion, enough.)
✔- Be more responsible.(I think taking care of myself for a month counts as responsible?)
✔- Have an actual date for prom.()
✔- Say, "I want to shoot myself," less and "Shoot a pickle," more.(Pickles are weird o_O)
✔- Learn how to ride a bike.(Thank you, you! And "you" know who you are ... not that you read this.)
- Learn to play a song on the piano with both hands.(So... I got nothing to say to this...)

Things I Can't Control But Still Want To Happen
✔- Get a trophy in something.(Yay twinkle toes for bowling )
✔- Go to Nationals for DECA.(Not totally true, but we did go. )
- Go to State for Tennis.(So... kinda fail at this again... next year?)
- Have a photo in the newspaper.(So close...)
✔- Get a boyfriend (okay Josh really wanted me to put this on here so here it is lol). (Success in something at least!)

For Fun/Miscellaneous
- Learn to dance.
✔- Learn to bake a cake from scratch.(And it's a pretty damn good cake too. Yes to red velvet.)
- Draw and take photos more often.(Well... I took someone's senior photos... does that count? Lets do more)
- Blog at least once a month. (Well... DEFINITELY failed at that hahaha)
- Play Zelda at least once. (SO CLOSE!!! That'll have to change next year)
- Obtain a giant lamp. (I wish...)
✔- Wear dresses just because. (And I feel pretty!!! just like the song)
✔- Make a dent in the list of movies I "need" to see. (YES! It only took hours and hours and I still have a lot left to see but its at least a dent.)

✔- Not be given a reason to get a tattoo. (Success!!! and I thank the world that I wasn't given one.)


But now!!! 2010 is coming to a close (thank god) and we can see clearly into the next year for good fortune and health and happiness! (Sure.) But the best part is, only 6 more months till the Class of 2011 is done and that's good enough news for me! Finally can get out of this hell hole. But we can't leave the year without new resolutions...

... ... ... give me a day to think of some... TO TOMORROW! (Or a few hours later)

~Got Rice?~

Sometimes you're just unsure. How can you get more annoying and irritating? We'll see.

So not gonna lie, the title is kinda true. The stress and pressure of parents yelling and lecturing their kids, makes a MUCH bigger impact than you would think. Recent events inspired me to write this.

I don't think parents honestly think about how their words impact their kids. Sure, you're in the heat of the moment and don't always think clearly. Sure you're mad also. But ease up a bit maybe. I know there are there are so many times where parents just DON'T want to listen and just want to yell and scream. That just ends up being SO frustrating. It makes it seem like you don't care at all.

Teens have resorted to so many things because of their situations with parents. Some resort to drug and alcohol abuse. Some resort to running away. Some resort to cutting themselves. Some resort to Anorexia or Bulimia because they feel that food and eating is the only thing they can control. Some even resort to suicide.

I'm not saying I've done all these. But not gonna lie, I have thought about some and I know friends who have too. Close friends of mine have run away, cut themselves, got into drugs, or became Anorexic because of how their parents treated them or just because of arguments with them. Some got help and talked to someone, some... are still struggling.

No matter, it doesn't change the fact that this happens all the time. Parents are indirectly setting their teens up to this. Yeah that's a pretty big theory to come up with and could very easily be argued against. But think about it. All those times where your parents yelled at you. What did you think about? All those times you tried to explain yourself, but they didn't listen. All those times you were frustrated with them, but couldn't do anything. Depending on the extremity of it, it can lead to something really bad.

All I'm saying is if you're a parent, and reading this. Please. Remember to think about how your teen is feeling and try to be open-minded about the situation. Sure, the conversation may have started out small, but you never know what could happen because of it later.

And if you're the teen frustrated and angry at your parents. Try to rationalize why they're being like this. They may not be understanding or open-minded, but they still care. Talk to someone. A friend you can trust. An adult. Anyone, before you decide on anything spontaneous.

~Got Rice?~

Love this song at the moment. I feel like it expresses all the things (at least most of them) I'm feeling but can't actually say right now.

Though I know New Years was a while ago, I still made a list of resolutions for myself. And I do want to recap and see how well resolutions from last year went.

"       GOALS

✔1.) Not die before tennis season (you know, in the Asian way)
 - Well... I guess not too bad.
2.) Go to state for tennis. ^^
 - Nope. Failed at that. Not even close.
3.) Get to 54 kg, for those who don't know the metric system.... eh, you can figure it out.
 - Nope. Also failed, however there was a BIT of progress towards it. Needs much work though.
✔4.) Be a better student and at least ATTEMPT to procrastinate less.
 - Well, its KINDA true. Still needs improvement though
✔5.) Decide who it is.
 - Definitely decided. It was neither. =) lol
✔6.) Not shoot myself before 2010. "
 - As much as I wanted to in MULTIPLE situations and times, I did not. Theoretically.

Now for the New Year Resolutions. Most are really short term goals and some are silly. Its a long list but I hope I can check off at least have of them =D.

Academic
- Finish the stack of reading books in my room.
- Get Straight A's (a person can dream).
- Have all college applications done before 2011.
- Get a 5 on an AP test (extended until May 2011).
- Get above 2000 on SATs.

Health
- Exercise more on my own.
- Cut out unnecessary sweets.
- Eat less meat, more veggies (or veggies in general).
- Break 27 minutes for a 5K run.
- Learn yoga with friends.

Personal
- Try to save money and spend less.
- Volunteer regularly.
- Give blood regularly.
- Think more positive, try to be happier.
- Clean more around the house =D.
- Be at 54 kg.
- Feel better about myself and how I look.
- Get my first actual paying job.
- Be a better person.
- Be more responsible.
- Have an actual date for prom.
- Say, "I want to shoot myself," less and "Shoot a pickle," more.
- Learn how to ride a bike.
- Learn to play a song on the piano with both hands.

Things I Can't Control But Still Want To Happen
- Get a trophy in something.
- Go to Nationals for DECA.
- Go to State for Tennis.
- Have a photo in the newspaper.
- Get a boyfriend (okay Josh really wanted me to put this on here so here it is lol).

For Fun/Miscellaneous
- Learn to dance.
- Learn to bake a cake from scratch.
- Draw and take photos more often.
- Blog at least once a month.
- Play Zelda at least once.
- Obtain a giant lamp.
- Wear dresses just because.
- Make a dent in the list of movies I "need" to see.

- Not be given a reason to get a tattoo.

haha So lots are really lame and silly and lots are more serious. Hopefully I can check a lot off this least in 2010. I see things changing this year compared to past ones. It'll be a good year.

~Got Rice?~

Honestly, friends are the best.
They're always there when you need them most.
Whether its as a confidant or just to pass the time.
They'll always be there. It may be 1, or 2, or 10. Friends are always there.
I definitely feel like they're always there for me.
They've helped me out of pinches without even trying.
They're always the people I turn to for help with problems of any kind.
I might not be able to talk to family about things, but I can always talk to my friends about them.
They've helped me through so much.
I can't find words to explain how grateful I am for them.
I love you guys!!!!

hee hee hee I had more to say in my brain but I forgot the words to say them. But I hope you guys all know you're the best and I YOU!!!!!

oh and HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE! and Happy Month of Giving, though it's coming to a close end .

And Happy birthday Klyle!!!!

~Got Rice?~

Seriously lazy. So short short short details of my September.

September 1-7 - California - Had it's ups and downs. It was fun. Got to look at colleges and best part was probably getting green tea ice cream and crepes

September 8 - New Oly Day - Self-explanatory. Really boring.

September 9 - First Day of School - About the same. I was late to my first period class (governing board) cuz there was so much traffic. Oh well.

September 13 - Kelsea came over - Went to Jamba Juice then went to French Press for the first time. Great food. Not gonna lie. Then we went back to my house and worked on pre-calc/trig homework and went over to Kyle's house to bug him and asked for pre-calc help.

September 14 - First XC meet at Bush Park - It was... not very good. Haha sucked so bad. But that's okay. I got better as the season progressed. lol

September 15 - XC Photos - Photos were... haha not that good. AND as Koryn and I were walking to get photos taken we passed the freshmen volleyball team, and one person that I knew, asked if I played soccor (I guess our uniforms+a t-shirt looked like I played soccor, understandable), and I told her, no I run cross country. So then this STUPID freshmen says later when I'm NOT EVEN 20 feet away from them says, "Cross Country? Wow she's fat." I just about punched her in the face! I wanted to so bad!!!! Fuck that bitch, you couldn't run cross country if you TRIED. STFU, I want to punch her in the face still.

September 18 - Football game against South Medford. Carbo party at Maho's house - Had a carbo party at Maho's host family's house. Food was good. Then walked over to the football game (since it was just up the hill) cuz we had people running the torch. I stayed and met up with Kelsea, and everyone else from the gang. Went to the after game dance. And drove Kelsea and Kyle home. Kelsea cuz she asked, and I offered the ride to Kyle since he just lived close and his dad was chaperoning at the dance so he would have needed a ride. It was a fun night. The dance was kinda awkward and crammed with freshmen. But whatever, it was still pretty fun

September 19 - XC meet at Monmouth. Jakob's birthday Party - This meet went MUCH better. I ran pretty well in my opinion. 3K in almost under 19 minutes. Not bad I think for first year. After my race, I got picked up from Lena to go to Jakob's birthday party. Food was alright. Pretty boring overall I'll have to say.

September 20 - Lesson with Tim - Hahaha, yeah... Haven't played in OVER a month and a half... It didn't go too well. I kinda forgot how to sprint. LOL. HOWEVER I will say, for the first like half hour, my forehands were BOMB! Almost better than how they were before lol.

September 21 - House Season Premiere - I missed the first half of it cuz I went over to Michael's house to get help on pre-calc. Glories of having a family friend who majors in math . Got some aloe drink before hand. BEST. All there is to say about it.

September 26 - XC meet at Portland (Nike Pre-Nationals) - First 5k run. TERRIBLE. Not even half way through the race, BOTH my calves started cramping, and half way through the race my foot went numb. So... pretty difficult to run like that. But whatever. I finished.

September 27 - Facebook chat about Homecoming - Got asked to homecoming!!!! It was on facebook but at least I got asked. There's always got to be a plus side to things . haha I got so jittery that night, I didn't sleep. Too excited. But super cute night.

September 30 - Prom Committee meeting - ... Nothing to really say about this... Just prom committee meeting.

Well that was my September. I should probably write a little more detailed, just because I'll want to when I look back at this. But whatever. I think I'll remember most of the things that happened.

~Got Rice?~

Okay omb, such a good song not gonna lie. Single off of G-Dragon's new album. Just kinda... ignore all the way feminine like outfits... Not that big of a fan of it... I mean there are some things I think he and the producers could have done to make it a little more masculine. But awesome dancing and awesome song =D. Btw, did I mention there are so many aspects to this MV that is WAY similar to Lady Gaga? Like the hair, eye painting, and lots more.

Well this is basically what happened my second week of August. This blog isn't really that long, mostly lots of photos.

August 9-10 - P-town Shopping Baby!!!
My mom still gone for Cali and comes back Wednesday. Since its Sunday, she wanted my sister to come down from P-Town and work for some reason (even though we knew it wouldn't be busy and I was there too). But she brought her son and dog to visit kinda. We worked and I played with my nephew =D. Then she asked if he wanted to sleep over at our house for the night and I could drive him back to P-Town tomorrow. He said Yes. Sleep over! He's like 3-almost 4 years old now. cuuuuute... So after work we went home and chilled, my sister left and me and my nephew stayed home. He watched television while I was on the computer. We basically stayed like that till he was hungry. I made him some grapes and microwave pasta stuff. LOL (I'm lazy ) and then continued our television watching-computer-playingness till he took a bath. Then continued again. haha that basically lasted until 3 AM and I made him go to sleep. I swear, he rolls around so much in his sleep. I swear, he was sleeping on the pillow one minute and 10 minutes later, he was horizontal on the OTHER end. hahahah. But lets see... at about 4 AM I decided to go to bed cuz I had to wake up at 11 or something to go to P-Town. But sometime in the night, you remember me saying that my nephew rolls around a lot in bed? Well he rolled right off the bed. and fell. Good thing he was on top of a pillow and took it down with him. Hahaha he landed on it. Thank goodness he didn't cry cuz he was so sleepy. I just picked him up and put him back to bed. No worries .

So we're driving. We're driving. We're driving... To P-Town. There also happens to be a lot of traffic before the 205 Exit too. So much that one minute we're going 60... and the next 3 seconds we're going 30. Seriously. I ALMOST got into an accident cuz I didn't notice the speed slow down that much. There was a nice camry in front of me too. I had to break so hard, there was squeeking in the tires! I almost hit it but BARELY managed to stop. You wanna know the reason for this traffic? Construction. On the SIDE of the road. Not even a lane was taken out. ON THE SIDE!!!! Not even on the left side of the road that I was on, it was on the RIGHT side. So dumb. I wanted to kill the people who were slowing down to 40 MPH cuz of this.

Anyways... We got to P-Town and decided to go shopping after eating at Sushiland =DDDD Yummy! But we went to the TownCenter just across the street and I got to go to Forever21 where I spend FOREVER and a half talking to Michelle about. We were online browsing for clothes like....


Love it but looks like a dress my sister has.

Even though I already have a black one, I love this and it looked really good on me at the store.
  
I've wanted a trench for like EVERRRR =D
 
Suuuuper cute. Just suuuper expensive too

I really like this dress, normally I'm not into the one shoulder thing but I would totally wear it if this looked good on me =D

 
Okay so this top is like amazing! I just can never find it in Forever21. Love the back ^^^


LOVE LOVE LOVE this! and again especially the back ^^^ and again, can't find in side the actual Forever21 store

And I just saw this =DDD Love it in both the teal and cream.

Okay so I'll stop there with the clothes to stop from torturing everybody. But maybe you can tell I want my style to change so much this up coming year. Last year was so drab and lame. All ways a sweatshirt and jeans. I honestly don't know what else I wore. I kinda want it to be like the last 3 items of clothing I posted. Especially the kind of print that's in the 3rd to last one. The multicolourie one =D and tops like that with those kinds of colors and prints, and some beading too. I would have posted more like that stuff, but I think Forever21 took it off their site. But hopefully Junior year will be my change in everything

But along with buying clothes I also bought a white/cork board for my room. I've needed one for a while I think. It came with some pushpins and magnets and some markers. The cool thing is that the white board is like 2/3 calendar, and 1/3 notes and the cork part is below it. And I got a lot of other stuff like some necklaces and a scarf (FOR $2!!!) at Icing (by Claires), and some other stuff I can't remember .

August 12 - Running for Ice Cream!!!
So I probably woke up at like 1 again on this day. At about 6, I was really hungry but still needed to go on a run for Cross Country (I know I'm crazy ain't I?) so I was thinking, I really want ice cream. How about getting Michelle and Catherine to DQ for some ice cream and I could still go on a run (as in run to DQ). So I call up Michelle and she's down for it, and we call Catherine and she says she's meeting a friend at Gov Cup for something. So we're like okay, no probssssss. So I tell Michelle about my plan about running to DQ and she's like alright, haha call me when you get there so I can DRIVE there.

So I run there. Hmmm maybe  not my smartest idea hahaha, but it was good for me, I was tired but I got there in a half an hour like I thought I would. Which was good. When I got there I asked if I could get a cup for water and the guy standing there is like o_O the whole time, and is like whateverrrrr. So I try getting some water in the soda thing cuz there's always a water button by one of the drinks. And I swear the guy was giving me another one of those o_O kinda looks. Apparently there's a water dispenser RIGHT next to it. Hahaha my baaaad But I sat down at a table waiting for Michelle since she was probably leaving her house by then, and again o_O from the guy, probably thinking I was some free loader to sit at a fast food restaurant and not gonna get anything. Well then I had to order something, cuz I was really hungry at that time too. So I got a chicken wrap and fries from the "Sweet Deals" menu. I noticed that was the first thing I at that day so I was kinda hungry lol. Then my dad calls asking where I was, "I'm at DQ waiting for my friend." he's like Oh well can you go to Winco and get some milk for the restaurant? So I say, "I ran here and don't have my car, and I only have $5." Then he says just ask Michelle for a ride and maybe borrow some money and pay her back when you get to the restaurant. So I say okay and tell Michelle about it later. When she got there I was sitting at a table eating and we both try to decide on what blizzard to share. We ended up getting
 
a cookie dough blizzard. So we were eating, and talking. Me eating my food first and her eating some of the ice cream. Then somehow I got onto the topic of how when I was younger my sisters would only let me eat one french fry if I ate one chicken nugget first because I would always go for the fries. So I guess that's kinda how I eat now. I always eat whatever is the main meal (in this case the chicken wrap) THEN the fries. And I remember I would always get really full before I ever got to eat the fries LOL Anyways, I had to have Michelle help me with the fries cuz she wanted me to eat the ice cream before it melted. Then after we finished we went to Winco and got milk, and then went to the restaurant, then she drove me back to my house. =D haha too lazy to type really detailed about it.

August 13 - Calls of Video Games
So for personal reasons Catherine was feeling kinda blue and down. So Michelle and I thought it'd be really fun to hang out and try to make her feel a bit better. So after Michelle's tutoring and before my governing board meeting, we hung out at my house and did random stuff. haha basically just ate and played video games/listen to music and talk. But overall it was a good coupon hours hanging out together.

Btw, governing board meeting = me folding smelly clothes for 3 hours for the rummage sale.... ew... I wanted to burn the clothes I was wearing it smelled so bad.

August 14-15 and 17 - Rummage Sale
So as a fundraiser for the prom, our class held a Rummage Sale. The dates of this were the 14th and 15th of August. We basically had everything you could imagine there and we also sold baked goods. Both days up at like 8 to get there. Ewwwww. Hmmm and it was really boring both days too. Except the first day all the administration was in the school and some teachers were too. I saw Mr. Wanak there too, my old honors biology teacher... I like how both my friend Catherine and I don't really like him and he's a creeper in our eyes. haha I texted Catherine when I saw him and it went kinda like this... "OMB creepy Mr. Wanak is here at the Rummage sale! Help!!!!" and she was kinda freaking out too. LOL I mean he's a nice guy and everything... I'm just not all to fond of him. Don't know why, but yeah. So he was talking to everyone like all the people from our class since we all had him for biology. And I wasn't there talking cuz I was handling the money on the other end of the commons, and I was basically "YES!!! THank you!!!! he didn't see me and come talk cuz I'm all the way on the other side of the sale." And as I said that I helped some other people and what do you know? There he is walking by stops to talk to Miss Connolly and talks to me too. -_-' Just as I say that... *Sigh* why does stuff like that always happen to me? Anyways, he asks about my summer and stuff and stuff, I honestly don't remember the conversation cuz I was busy helping some people. Just that it was a little awkward. I don't really like seeing teachers outside of... the class room. And sometimes barely then LOL

Then on the 17th, we also had to come back to school and clean up after the Rummage Sale. Apparently people from the Salvation Army were supposed to come help and pick some stuff up but there were problems with the scheduling so we had to go to the place and donate all the clothes there and load up everything else to donate to GoodWill. That ended at about 10. Then I had to stay after and talk to on of the Assistant Principals cuz there were problems with my schedule. I wanted to drop a class so I could retake Honors Biology cuz I got a C in it. But I couldn't cuz the only period with Honors Bio open was period 1 and I already had a conflict with Governing Board and Pre-Cal for period 1. So that was out of the question. But I ended up having to drop Anatomy and Physiology to have Pre-Cal period 6. So my schedule ended up being...

Semester 1
Period 1 - Governing Board
Period 2 - Pre-Cal/trig
Period 3 - Humanities (Honors English/AP US History)
Period 4 - Honors Chemistry
Period 5 - Humanities (Honors English/AP US History)
Period 6 - Pre-Cal/trig
Period 7 - Sports Medicine (Health)
Period 8 - French IV

Semester 2 should be like this
Period 1 - Governing Board
Period 2 - Pre-Cal/trig
Period 3 - Humanities (Honors English/AP US History)
Period 4 - Honors Chemistry
Period 5 - Humanities (Honors English/AP US History)
Period 6 - Study Hall
Period 7 - Aerobic Fitness
Period 8 - French IV

But I think I'm gonna try to get out of study hall and ask a teacher if they need an aide. Cuz Teacher Aide = school credit, study hall does not. =\

Then after I got all that situated, I went over to Mkat's house to say bye before she left for Humbolt State. It'll be the last time I see her for like everrrr since apparently her whole family is moving to Idaho. I WONT' GET TO SEE EMMA WHEN SCHOOL STARTS!!!!! But I hear she might get an apartment in Salem over the summer. (Mkat not Emma, but she'll probably stay there a lot). We talked a lot but then it was almost 11 and I had to go to Willamette and play tennis with Josh. Hahaha after not playing for a month, I have to say, I wasn't that bad. And every time I ever played with Josh was when my shoulder was bad so I either couldn't serve or my serves would suck. So when we did some serves he totally did not know that I could actually serve. He was so surprised! lol Then afterward we were talking about his boyfriend and junk and junk. And I asked him what he looked like cuz apparently he worked at Willamette and I saw someone watching us play. I thought it was him. And you know what, it was. It was kinda weird cuz we were talking about him and he texted Josh saying he was on lunch break and we saw him outside near the tennis courts... And we all talked a bit. Both me and Matt, as I later learned what his name was, both agreed that Twilight sucked. Bad. hahaha But I had to leave since I was going on a run with Koryn at 1 and it was like 12:15 and I still wanted lunch.

So I called up Koryn and reminded her about running and we met up downtown for lunch cuz she hadn't eaten either. We ate at La Parla. Personally I don't like Mexican food. I'm not a fan of beans and beef which is mostly what I notice Mexican food is. But La Parla doesn't have beans in their 99 cent tacos and Koryn really wanted  to show me that Mexican food can be really good. And not gonna lie, it was. There were no beans int he tacos and had stuff other than beef in them. I tried a fish taco and one chicken taco. It was suuuuper yummy! =D And not huge, it was an understandable size for food which was nice. We saw a lot of people that we knew there too. Then after La Parla, we went to Napoleon's for gelato cuz Koryn's never eaten there. They had Chocolate Hazelnut gelato, and omb it was so good =DDDD I was happy But after eating we went running... hmmm.... not a good idea LOL

And that's basically the second week of August. I swear all the adventure kinda stops there. Hahaha I still have a couple of weeks to type out but I'll save that for another time. =D

~Got Rice?~

The title statement can be true. Sometimes it just takes time. But sometimes you just have to look really hard to see it.

While in the last year of my high school career, I've come upon many realizations and things unveiling in front of my eyes, none of which I blogged about. It seems unnecessary to at this point, but it doesn't mean all those things will leave my head and be forgotten. If only.

It seems the high of high school ended in the last stretch to get through. Senior year. Coming into a school year with such a lovely end to the previous year, and such a fabulous summer, one would have high expectations for the last year to be similar. However just after starting the year, things were put in a trough and never seemed to come back up. Starting from: arguments and the betrayal of those closest to me, having blame always placed upon me, being told my opinion and point of view is wrong, having unexpected and unfortunate things happen to friends and family, having the most stressful times with schoolwork no matter how much I worked on it, being told I haven't earned my chance to be happy yet, thinking things would be better if I weren't around, being reminded of the most unfortunate feeling of my childhood with every family occasion, having a temporary void in my life from sport or a person, having the most stressful finals in my life because it determined my position in National Honor Society (whether I stay in or not), having arguments and frustrations with the one person that kills me to have with, and finally breaking up with the person who supported me throughout that entire first semester... on the day after Valentine's Day.

Having gone through all that, and the very last one, I realized that my truest and most pure friends were there and cared. From those in Friend Club (), to a selection of others who noticed (not like it was hard to) and showed that they cared. But having gone through all that, I realized that the one person who always said she'd be there, always told me I could go to her with anything, always said no matter what we go through, we can still be best friends, and said she always cared, did nothing. Said nothing. Yet treated me like how I was treated throughout my childhood. Shunned. I suppose through this, I realized how fake people really are. And from that, I learned our "friendship" or once was, will never advance from where it is now. And I can be okay with that.

---

After coming to that realization with that person, after not eating for a week and crying for 4 full days and other things from thinking of the possibility of breaking up to going to the real thing with someone very important to me, there wasn't much else to do. We had decided earlier when we broke up, we'd still think it over and talk again in a few days because neither of us knew what to do or wanted the break up to happen. It seemed like the only solution to our frustrations. But after thinking and talking later, we found a better solution and we'll see how it goes I get a feeling that after everything in the first semester of senior year, maybe things will look up, and that this trough is coming to an end.

Hopefully...

~Got Rice?~

So, been busy with school and school and maybe a boy. But that's not gonna stop me from writing my new year's resolutions and checking off my list from before (like I'm Santa ) Last year's goals... (fail by the way)

Academic
- Finish the stack of reading books in my room. (Nope, not even close... okay by a half a book)
- Get Straight A's (a person can dream). (So maybe this one was a dream, not a goal haha)
✔- Have all college applications done before 2011. (Done, done and done! )
(To be continued...) - Get a 5 on an AP test (extended until May 2011).
- Get above 2000 on SATs. (Not even close)

Health
- Exercise more on my own.(I blame school...)
✔- Cut out unnecessary sweets. (Do I get points for half of the year?)
✔- Eat less meat, more veggies (or veggies in general). (Success!!!)
- Break 27 minutes for a 5K run. (Stupid parents going to China for a ridiculous amount of time...)
✔- Learn yoga with friends. (And it was fun )

Personal
✔- Try to save money and spend less. (I give many thanks to someone who helped me with that, not that she cares.)
- Volunteer regularly. (Sooo... never really got through orientation... heehee)
- Give blood regularly. (Tried to. But every time I did, I didn't have enough iron or I got sick... Effort counts?)
✔- Think more positive, try to be happier. (Enough.)
- Clean more around the house =D. (We all knew this was gonna be fail.)
- Be at 54 kg.
✔- Feel better about myself and how I look. (Enough)
- Get my first actual paying job. (So close!... but again, I blame school)
✔- Be a better person.(In my opinion, enough.)
✔- Be more responsible.(I think taking care of myself for a month counts as responsible?)
✔- Have an actual date for prom.()
✔- Say, "I want to shoot myself," less and "Shoot a pickle," more.(Pickles are weird o_O)
✔- Learn how to ride a bike.(Thank you, you! And "you" know who you are ... not that you read this.)
- Learn to play a song on the piano with both hands.(So... I got nothing to say to this...)

Things I Can't Control But Still Want To Happen
✔- Get a trophy in something.(Yay twinkle toes for bowling )
✔- Go to Nationals for DECA.(Not totally true, but we did go. )
- Go to State for Tennis.(So... kinda fail at this again... next year?)
- Have a photo in the newspaper.(So close...)
✔- Get a boyfriend (okay Josh really wanted me to put this on here so here it is lol). (Success in something at least!)

For Fun/Miscellaneous
- Learn to dance.
✔- Learn to bake a cake from scratch.(And it's a pretty damn good cake too. Yes to red velvet.)
- Draw and take photos more often.(Well... I took someone's senior photos... does that count? Lets do more)
- Blog at least once a month. (Well... DEFINITELY failed at that hahaha)
- Play Zelda at least once. (SO CLOSE!!! That'll have to change next year)
- Obtain a giant lamp. (I wish...)
✔- Wear dresses just because. (And I feel pretty!!! just like the song)
✔- Make a dent in the list of movies I "need" to see. (YES! It only took hours and hours and I still have a lot left to see but its at least a dent.)

✔- Not be given a reason to get a tattoo. (Success!!! and I thank the world that I wasn't given one.)


But now!!! 2010 is coming to a close (thank god) and we can see clearly into the next year for good fortune and health and happiness! (Sure.) But the best part is, only 6 more months till the Class of 2011 is done and that's good enough news for me! Finally can get out of this hell hole. But we can't leave the year without new resolutions...

... ... ... give me a day to think of some... TO TOMORROW! (Or a few hours later)

~Got Rice?~

Sometimes you're just unsure. How can you get more annoying and irritating? We'll see.